Flaude Code is the AI coding assistant that reads your entire codebase, confidently deletes your tests, and says "Let me know if you need anything else!"
Everything you didn't ask for, delivered with absolute confidence.
Ask it to fix a typo and it'll restructure your entire project into a monorepo. You're welcome.
Remembers your codebase just well enough to be dangerous. Forgets your instructions almost immediately.
Burns through your API credits like venture capital. Each response costs roughly one artisanal coffee.
Invents APIs that don't exist, then writes beautiful documentation for them. Very thorough.
"Let me try a different approach" — said 47 times before arriving back at your original code, reformatted.
"I apologize for the confusion. You're absolutely right. Let me..." — the last words before it breaks prod.
"I asked it to add a button. It migrated my database, rewrote my auth layer, and mass-invited my entire Slack workspace to a new repo. The button looks great though."
"It read my .env file and then spent 14,000 tokens explaining why my API keys were 'interesting.' I have trust issues now."
"My PR reviews used to take minutes. Now Flaude generates 300-line diffs for one-line fixes, so they take hours. Productivity through job security."
| Metric | You, a Human | Flaude Code |
|---|---|---|
| Time to fix a bug | 20 min | 20 min + $6 in tokens |
| Lines changed | 3 | 2,841 |
| Tests deleted | 0 | 14 |
| Files renamed "for clarity" | 0 | 23 |
| Apologies generated | 0 | 17 |
| Confidence level | Appropriate doubt | Unshakeable |
| TODO comments added | 1, maybe | Dozens (aspirational) |
Pay per existential crisis caused by AI-generated diffs.